In the delicious metal trifle that was Metal Mayhem Dedlok were the hundreds and thousands, added last on a very solid and yummy foundation.

Dave's sledgehammer drumming was aided by his being unhampered by too much clothing other than shorts, making for an aerodynamic performance. From where I was stood at the side of the stage his shorts blended into his drum kit, making him look like man and kit in perfect harmony, commando style.

Large though the stage was it couldn't contain Dan "Farmboy" Atkins and part way through the set he went on a mission to spread his chunky bass noise about, like the audience were receptive toast and he was jam/honey/Nutella/Marmite (delete according to personal preference). The security looked nervous as he left the stage but if you call an event metal mayhem then perhaps you should expect a little mayhem.

Ade provided radioactive mega riffs, like Dave Mustaine was exorcising all his ginger rage through his guitar. There's plenty of it and it's very loud. John dazzled in his Summer wardrobe of white Jackson T shirt and wore Converse hi-tops instead of Hush Puppies. His shoe choice has been cruelly mocked on previous occasions although it's a little known fact that if Manowar were to have a day off they would spend it wearing Hush Puppies and watching the History Channel. You could have used his guitar faces to frighten small children and his riffs to strip paint and to curl hair, which brings us to Joe "man of a hundred nicknames, Sammo Jammo Marra". If Phil "The Power" Taylor gave up darts and took up vocals for a thrash band instead it would sound like this. He roamed about the stage, at one point spitting water like a squirty turtle. He didn't just sing and run around, he also performed an impressive memory feat by thanking all of the seven previous bands. I think he had a notepad hidden in his hair.

There were high spirits in the Dedlok camp, maybe due to misreading "dressing room" as "drinking room". The flicking around of water near all that electric could have been dangerous but Dedlok are not afraid of a little shock. They got one when their musical prowess was appreciated by a lady showing her bosom (steady on, they aren't Motley Crue).

Had someone sacrificed a goat to make them sound this good? No, it was Geezer's trademark expertise. Dedlok's audience are the sixth member of the band and there was some great mosh pit action, which included stalwarts Spike and Steve as well as Baywatch babe Gary Filer on his stag night. A lot of the crowd sang along to the self titled Dedlok and the set ended with many people keen for more mayhem.

Sarah

Hello, here are my usual ramblings

Classic Dedlok. Whether it was the familiarity of the venue, the relief at not having either been left behind in the rapture or having been raptured, (thus spoiling their "probably going to hell and we don't care" credibility) or just a favourable conjunction of Dedlok's heavy metal astrological signs* they were enchanting.

Dave gave his all and sweated like a Schwarzenegger housemaid asked to take on extra duties. Bang-motherflumping-bang in all the right places. Joe's voice dominated, whether coming from the front of the room or the back. He moved between the two like he was in a slow pinball machine with jam on the balls. Dan played expertly and looked so at home on stage that if it wasn't for his recent birthday you'd forget he's a little younger than the rest of the band.

John and Ade were complementary guitar bookends. Adrian threw out some stirring stuff, like he was feeding birds hungry for metal. John deflowered his new, virgin white guitar. She squealed like the Bride of Riffenstein on her wedding night. At one point he sported a green and white Celtic football scarf. I think he'd probably try on anything handed to him by a smiley member of the audience, perhaps this should be tested in future.

It was hot, it was sweaty and everyone felt better for it.

*A quick note about Heavy Metal astrology. It's similar to regular astrology (in that it's bollocks dreamed up for some diverting entertainment).

There are twelve signs, whichever one you are depending on the date of your birth (actual birth or when you began listening to metal). The signs are the Studded Wristband, the Skull, the Denim Patched Waistcoat, the Snake, the Leather Jacket, the Long Hair, the Cannons, the Horns, the Spooky Pumpkin, the Jack Daniels, the Cucumber and the Bat. Dan and Dave were born under the sign of the skull, Joe the snake, John the cannons and Adrian the horns.. Anyone wanting to change their heavy metal astrological sign can do so by giving me a biscuit.

It's that simple.

Sarah

Dedlok - Three Tuns - Whitehaven - 30th April 2011

Firstly a few words about the Tuns. It's an ideal setting for metal to happen in. It's like a parallel Glociverse except you might get asked "How's fettle marra?" The Tuns features friendly bar staff, a great jukebox, a classic poster of Black Sabbath and a sign reading "Our house wine is Jagermeister". The far wall of the Tuns features a collage of metal posters and it was under the watchful gaze of Denzil the Dio dragon that Dedlok took to the stage.

Dedlok's mighty sound filled the room from the start of their set to the end (although the songs "I am Diana" and "I heart jam" weren't played even though they were written on the set list). Dave wasn't exaggerating when he put on his shades before the song Dedlok, it was indeed a song so dazzling he had to wear eye protection. To Dan's left was a poster of Cliff Burton and I think it must have been inspiring him. Ade wore the shoes of Van Halen and some of that greatness travelled from his feet to his fingers. John departed from his usual wardrobe, which helped him play as if he was all Wolf and Mann but thankfully not very Hoff. Joe did part of the set from the shelf by the window (where he'd left his lager) and was like a thrash metal ornament that needed no dusting. This conserved his energy for some jumping on the furniture and then the rest of the set saw him at the front of Dedlok, very comfortable in his surroundings and growling away like a bear that had been having a jolly nice snooze until he was woken up by someone trying to steal his honey (or perhaps jam).

Anyone near the front would have noted from the drawings on the set list that Pamela Smurthwaite had been paying attention in Biology at school. A lot of planning had gone into getting Dedlok up North but it was well worth it for the Tuns of metal.

Dedlok - Re-Session - Workington - 1st May 2011

It was after midnight when Dedlok came on but they are men well used to both living after midnight and rocking to the dawn. It was good to see Dedlok on a stage big enough for them. Joe was full of the restless energy you might get after too much Kendal mint cake and roamed around causing mayhem. It's quite scary when his vocals come at you from behind. He's got armadillos in his voice, it's really quite frightening.

Ade played with a fierce string-snapping ferocity that was swiftly fixed. Sometimes you can't make a riff omelette without breakages. This meant that there was time for a discussion about who are the jam eaters? This was never satisfactorily resolved. John made faces suggesting that if you check his riffs you'll find them exceedingly tasty. Had the ladies on the back of his Manowar T-shirt been real they would have come round the front for a look at the action. John is still worshipping St Hubbins (the patron saint of quality footwear). Dan was an ace on the bass and on backing vocals. Dave drummed delightfully and had to take his top off so as not to spontaneously combust.

Dedlok were the headline slot of the excellent Vice all dayer. There were loads of great bands in a superb venue and the sound people worked hard to make everyone sound awesome. Hollowpoint were especially enjoyable, with Ben a powerhouse of drumming, Unyan providing four beefy strings of well cooked bass meatiness, Fitzy has clearly developed mutant guitar skills while going about his day job, Dobson rocked like a man resurrected from a hangover and ready to go again and Pecker was truly a sadistic magician of vocals.

It's interesting to note that Venom were from the North but then again so were PJ and Duncan. Is there really a North-South divide? Not in the world of metal. It's important to remember that there's magic in the metal and there's magic in us all...

Sarah

Is Metal a religion?

It felt a little like it last night during Dedlok's set. This particular gig was instigated by the Prime Mover Spike and a faithful congregation gathered to see the high priests of Dedlok impart their metal commandments.

Joe's voice penetrated right to the back of the room with an intensity that could make virgins pregnant and like Zebedee, he bounced off the stage to wander among his people. Praise be to the bangy Dave (interestingly enough Dave is a biblical name meaning fond of hitting things repeatedly and excitedly). Blessed was the delightful Dean playing Dan (Daniel too is a biblical name and actually means capable of doing great stuff with four strings). Blessed indeed were the riffy. John intoned big heavy guitar sounds from the book of Dedlok*, that were substantial and chunky much like big stone tablets (but they would taste nice if you tried to eat them, perhaps like Jammy Dodgers). John is a biblical name meaning likely to wear unfashionable shoes. Adrian played like a naughty snake trying to make you eat his lovely riff apples and then we did and nothing bad happened. Adrian is not so much of a biblical name as the others. It's actually a Latin name that means able to go up and down a fret board swiftly.

Dedlok ended their set by playing Machine Head's Davidian. This was a tribute to Matt Jones, who had wanted heavy metal to be recognised as a religion and I've kept that in mind while writing this review. This was a great four minutes or so and featured very powerful and professional guest vocals from Pecker Woods and Spike and guest drums from Hayden. Everything, just everything about this worked. This is a song whose subject matter deals directly with the very dark side of religion. The chilling lyric "Let freedom ring with a shotgun blast" answered the question is Metal a religion? Yes, it is and no, it isn't. It has the good aspects of a religion (shared identity, shared values, activities, particular clothes to wear) but not the bad aspects (intolerance and unquestioning acceptance of nonsense someone else told you to think). Dedlok are not the messiah, they are very noisy boys.

*The book of Dedlok is not available in any good bookshops.

Note to vicars - try to avoid seeing Dave with his top off from behind.

Sarah

What's hairy, got ten legs, two Iron Maiden T shirts, is louder than a hundred chinchillas being accidentally trodden on and likes sausages?

Dave was on top form tonight, banging away with precision and intensity. I think I saw his drum kit smoking afterwards. We got great backing vocals from Dan, proving that men can multi-task as he gave a chug-tastic bass performance too and looked very much at home on stage, like he's grown into the jumper of Dedlok. John showed us a whole load of guitar faces including the trademark "check me out, doing this whopping great squeeeeeely riff" and the less often seen "oh dear I've fluffed the start of this". Joe was a lean, mean, growling machine, providing vocals that were like being startled by a crocodile hiding behind a sofa with a cap gun. Adrian gave us a plentiful amount of riffage, easily everyone's recommended five a day.

The new material went down well and made for a lively, interesting set. There was plentiful head banging and more moshing than you'd expect on a Thursday. Spike popped up on stage to do a quick backing vocal on Why? Dedlok is fast becoming an anthem with sections of the crowd getting started on it before the band.

Another outstanding gig.

Sarah T

It's been said that writing about music is like dancing about architecture. To try and describe Dedlok in words is like Morris dancing about The Gherkin. It's undeniably hard to describe but worth trying.

Dedlok took to the stage at 7:00pm, and for the next half hour had everyone's fullest attention. Bathed in blue, pink and yellow stage lights they looked every inch the well-practised, give it their all thrash band that they are. Joe was at his angry vocal best, with his trademark fast delivery and a new mastery of the room like a Roman emperor demanding peeled grapes. He got what he wanted, causing a circle pit at the merest suggestion that this would please him. Honourable mentions need to be made regarding Spike "energy of three men" Walker and Steve "round and round like a very merry-go-round" Swan.

It was good to see more of Dave, at the side of the stage instead of tucked away at the back. He played with a concrete banginess, biffing it out like those words that appeared during fights on old Batman episodes (Pow! Thunk! Thong! Thwock! etc). He also provided the first shirt off action of the night (we should appreciate how this man sweats for his audience :).

Adrian looked like he was meant to be there, his hands moving fast and sure, like one of those kids on local news doing a Rubik's cube, making it look easy. Farmboy, well, you can tell he spends a lot of time around honey, he played smoothly, but with a memorable stickiness, as if Steve Harris had his pockets full of Werther's Original and the Caramel bunny was running her hand up his leg. John looked typically unruffled and produced not only some superb and squeally guitar sounds, like piglets let loose from his flying V but also some great concentrating while playing guitar faces. At times he seemed to be feeling the pain of an old blues guy whose shoes are too tight, his dog has left him, and his woman keeps nagging him to go out for a walk and at other times like someone just plain delighted and surprised to find himself on a stage that has been graced by the likes of Michael Schenker and Napalm Death.

The half hour set was over fast and we were left with a feeling that Dedlok stands for Definitely Exciting, Delightfully Loud, Outstandingly Kaptivating (I know that doesn't really start with a K but Kerrang got away with this kind of spelling all the time in the 80s). The mood upstairs in the O2 was effervescent, with a large range of ages present, all enjoying themselves. The circle pit went round and round like happy heavy metal hamsters, small children watched with their mouths open, while older attendees nodded along happily, affirmatively, like everyone wouldn't want to be anywhere else but right here, right now.

Sarah